Day 1: Your Best Friend

Dear best friend,

We're on the phone right now, so I don't really know why I'm writing this, but I figured if I was going to do this 30 letters ordeal, I wasn't going to half ass it. Calling you my best friend feels weird because you are so much more than that. You are a lover, a friend, a right hand, a partner in crime, an enemy, a compadre, and many more things that would take much time off my life span to list. I owe you the world and then some for always being there, even when I pushed you away beyond repair, for playing along with my bullshit and being you but I must admit, I'm scared, because though I love you with every molecule in my body, I know that realistically everything ends, and that makes me shit bricks because if I lose my best-friend than I essentially lose everything. If I lose you, I have to start all over again and it will never be the same, and I'm not just being melodramatic, because I'm old enough to differ drama from real emotion, but it has gotten to the point where it will never be the same. Maybe for you but definitely not for me. I've never been in a situation where I put all my cards on the table and I don't want to do that with anybody else, and it may be childish and infantile to think that way, but there are certain bonds you experience in life that you know, you just know, that no matter what, even if you wrote a step by step booklet from beginning to end based on the previous bond to try and replicate it you never could and that's the terrifying part of it all.

Much love,
illa.

P.S: Peace to Brooklyn.