Thursday, June 17, 2010

Day 3: Your parents

Dear mum and dad,

I'm going to start this off with a thank you. Thank you for being the greatest, most supporting, chill and loving parents one could ever ask for. There has never been anything that I wanted to do (even the obviously detrimental shit) that you guys didn't support or encourage me in. In all honesty, I feel like I really took that for granted in my younger days. I never really realized the importance of having loving parents until I got older and started working with youth and looked at myself like "Damn, Illa, you're not that bad".

Sometimes when I was younger, I would wake up to you guys fighting, and (spare me, I was young) I would pray for you guys to get a divorce. I would pray for one of you to get fed up enough with the others bullshit and just leave, hopefully without dropping bombs and putting us in the middle. It never occurred to me how much you guys love each other. Despite everything, you guys were still together for over 2 decades. That's admirable. I admire it.

Having you as parents taught me that for things to pan out in love and relationships, you must put your pride aside (I've yet to master it, but I have indeed grasped it.). That's the only way it'll ever work. And that's the only way you'll know that person is the one for you. At times I feel like no matter what I do in any relationship, I will never measure up to yours, and I'm perfectly fine with it, because if anybody knows hardship and work it's you guys, but I can only hope I do as good a job raising my children and being a significant other as you did.

I owe you forever and then some and would give you my left lung, thank you for keeping my head above water in times when I didn't want to wake up the next morning.

Much love,
illa.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Day 2: Your Crush.

Dear James Franco,

Honestly, I’m not even sure if I should be writing you this letter, I contemplated three people to possibly write to and picked you because you most likely will never see this and because I am full of cowardice, I think that’s good. My infatuation with you began with the movie Never Been Kissed. I was like.. 11. It was pretty gross, I kept you hidden for the majority of my young life, because I didn’t want anyone else to like you… that was obviously very effective… that was sarcasm, I’m assuming you’re good at picking up on it, because in my head, you’re pretty damn perfect, even though I know good and well you may very well be dumb as a rock or smell like a fucking foot, I choose to disregard that, because I will never meet you and I will keep you at the prime of perfection for as long as I possibly can. I understand, you generally like scrawny white hipster bitches - tis coo’, I just wanted you for sex anyway. Jussayin’. Peace and blessings be unto you, even though you’ll probably never even read this.

Cheers,

illa.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Day 1: Your Best Friend

Dear best friend,

We're on the phone right now, so I don't really know why I'm writing this, but I figured if I was going to do this 30 letters ordeal, I wasn't going to half ass it. Calling you my best friend feels weird because you are so much more than that. You are a lover, a friend, a right hand, a partner in crime, an enemy, a compadre, and many more things that would take much time off my life span to list. I owe you the world and then some for always being there, even when I pushed you away beyond repair, for playing along with my bullshit and being you but I must admit, I'm scared, because though I love you with every molecule in my body, I know that realistically everything ends, and that makes me shit bricks because if I lose my best-friend than I essentially lose everything. If I lose you, I have to start all over again and it will never be the same, and I'm not just being melodramatic, because I'm old enough to differ drama from real emotion, but it has gotten to the point where it will never be the same. Maybe for you but definitely not for me. I've never been in a situation where I put all my cards on the table and I don't want to do that with anybody else, and it may be childish and infantile to think that way, but there are certain bonds you experience in life that you know, you just know, that no matter what, even if you wrote a step by step booklet from beginning to end based on the previous bond to try and replicate it you never could and that's the terrifying part of it all.

Much love,
illa.

P.S: Peace to Brooklyn.

30 days of letters.

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 — Your sibling(s) (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror